Sunday, July 03, 2011
Days #42 & 43- Work and Guilt
Talk about a productive day!
I was up at 7:30am and and watering the yard and garden. I told my wife that it was nice to have the watering done before the time I had been getting up the past few days. I am not sure what is wrong with me. I don't go to bed super late (at least not later than I have in the past) and I still can't get up before 9am with out it being a major event. I hope that I can keep it up.
After I got the yard all watered, I headed over to the school. I felt good about it since my wife was feeling a bit better and my daughter was going to be staying to help her with anything she might need. It was nice to clean up things and go through all my "stuff" that I had in boxes and tubs. I found things I thought I had lost (which I promptly put in the donate pile since I hadn't been using them) and I found things I couldn't believe that I had kept (which I also either threw away or put on the donate pile).
I feel like I really made some headway in the battle of "Clean the Room". My wife walked over to have lunch and then she was able to just relax and visit with Ms. D for a few minutes while I finished with the small stuff I still needed to go through.
We headed out and went to ACE to get some of the sale items we had marked out on the ad. (Funny side story. We went in on Wednesday to get the items and had out cart loaded. We got to the front and was informed the sale didn't start until Friday. So, we felt a bit embarrassed and said we would be back). After ACE we went to the church to copy programs and then we went to the store to get some food items that were on sale.
The rest of the evening was spent enjoying our children and watching random TV shows. My oldest son and my next youngest son arrived back from the races with grandma and grandpa Hughes just before midnight. They had a great time and I appreciate my parents for being willing to take them.
So, that was Saturday.
Sunday, Day 43.
I was awake at 6:20am because of my early morning church meetings. I felt pretty good, but my wife was not feeling good at all. I really thing she has a UTI. We have her on cranberry pills and juice and are waiting for news from the hospital on the results of her culture.
Church was okay. I noticed a dear friend was sad and I was worried for him/her. I was also worried that it was because of myself or my family. I have felt a huge load of guilt lately about all that has happened with my wife and all the help we are receiving. I know I have covered this many times, but it bears discussing again.
I look around me and I know, though no one would ever say it, that people are getting sick and tired of hearing about the Hughes family, of bringing us meals (which will end this week- and we STILL can't say thank you enough for everyone's thoughtfulness) of the money, time, effort, and service that has been extended. It is overwhelming and causes serious guilt. I know, I know, I know. Be thankful for what we are given. Are we taking too much? Are we asking for more help than we should? Are we ruining friendships because we are stretching a willingness to help too far?
We hope not, and we have never meant to hurt anyone. It is a strange position we are in. We need help in some areas, yet we feel like we are starting to get back in the swing of parenting and the overwhelming needs of six children. Thank you, thank you, thank you for all everyone has done.
Friday was a strange day for us. We had intended to get up and head home. When our friend offered lunch we agreed knowing that we needed to eat. I guess we should have headed home after that. After all, we had asked friends to watch our children at a HUGE inconvenience to them and their families. But we didn't, and while we enjoyed visiting with friends, we should have been driving home to resume our responsibility as parents.
With so few true friends out there, we hope that we haven't ruined any friendships beyond repair. We love you all and are grateful for all that you have done.
As for the rest of the evening:
We just enjoyed a wonderful meal that was thoughtfully provided by members in the ward and I am working to revive my poor heat beaten garden with some soothing, cool water. We are hoping to go for a walk this evening and possibly drive around and return dishes to those who have brought meals.
Tomorrow should be a great day- Fourth of July.
Have a great evening...